See the Light

Ive come to a conclusion early this morning i want to do some painting.. pretty random even for my standards, I was going to decorate the kitchen, but I'm being pulled more into need to draw and paint direction with people.. I used to love doing portraits when i was younger.

The last 6 weeks have been much better, Ive had no more problems health wise, except for the fact i don't like how i feel at the moment.. Sluggish. That I'm going to start working on today and try to slowly build myself back up again strength wise. I haven't been riding for 2 months and miss it greatly, its the same with salsa, a couple of lessons where my fella took me gingerly. I'm feeling pretty well now so want to reignite a few sparks my health put a damper on.. My things i couldn't do anymore but want to start again..

I'm beginning to believe my fellas theory of stopping smoking could have done this to me.. I did smoke pretty heavy, I'll admit that now, the shock of not smoking could have indeed caused whats happened.. I don't regret it though, I'm glad i stopped. I feel so much better in other ways.
I brought my fella a home brew kit, when he was shut indoors looking after me and positive things have come from this spell in our lives.. One being hes bloody good at making wine now! I've become a dab hand at jams, bread and cooking in general but using only what i grow in my garden to cook with.. Its a challenge and brings such a feel good factor when you get to eat and drink what you've created.....

I never have been a wine drinker which is a shame as there's nothing my fella likes better than cooking a lovely meal and sharing a bottle, so I'm now in training to learn to appreciate its taste and share a bottle over dinner.. after all hes made it so its the least i can do.. We gave my sister a bottle yesterday as she turned up with a beautiful set of copper frying pans for me to swap for jam! they have been hanging in her kitchen unused for years so she brought then to what she called a good home! She phoned up last night pretty late with my mum telling me my fella has hidden talents.. as his wine was bloody amazing stuff..lol

Ive got this huge urge to create stuff, read, paint and go canoeing so the next month along with riding and salsa I'm hoping to do just that.

The dongle (that's what i call it) that's implanted into my chest, reminds me every morning that you really do need to make the most of every day you get. I was guilty of taking things for granted as much as the next man and thankfully have seen the light..

I've even managed to talk my fella into hiring a canoe with me and seeing how many ducks we can scare the crap out of.....

My mum is trying to rebuild her life and I'm the first person up, telling her she needs to do this, watching her get knocked back again yesterday reminds me just how selfish some people can be, but its not about those people... its all about us and what good things we can do with our time here.. Its called making the most of it and not taking anything for granted..

For me today starts with positive thoughts and a belief that things are and will, now change for the better..

Going for a walk

Yesterday was a really good day. Not as good as it could have been as Ryan didnt go, I couldnt get him and his girlfriend in the car so next year im hiring a mini bus and taking tents.
We wanted to camp but only the stall holders are allowed so im having a stall next year selling bags and belts, that way we can stay over and make a weekend of it. Paul and Kate are up for camping too. I've just gotta do this, the urge is getting worse to just grab a tent and go now..
The more i look at these festivals the more i like the thought of going to them all.. so thanks to Saturday i think im gonna have a look round and see how many more are going on.. That i can take a tent to !!
Im thinking of going hiking soon with my fella to either Ireland Scotland and the Lake District.. Everytime i see an advert on the TV for them seeing those hills and all that greenery, feels like its calling out to me at the moment.. I want to feel the wind in my hair and walk for England.... Literally, we can just stop off at b & bs along the way when we need a shower and end up where we end up... In the lake sounds appealing too.. Those places look amazing.. saturday there was a group there who played Irish folk music, i didnt know at the time but 2 were Laurens school teachers! They were bloody brilliant, I couldnt help my feet it just made you feel so happy, Happy music.. So ive asked her today so go get me his CD.. I could just see myself joining them with a violin playing away......hehe What a great thing to do..
Yesterday i spent the day cooking.. It didn't start out like that, but the kids and my fella kept going on about bread, so i ended up being slung off my computer and spending the day cooking, they were eating it faster than i could cook! The bread ive been told is the best yet! Not that i can eat the bugger..lol
Im now going to tackle the packing as the orders are printing out as i type, and im grabbing the poor dogs again for an hour and going for another walk..... They will think ive lost the plot with all these walks..

Bookworm

I took an unexpected day off yesterday and really enjoyed it! I did the packing early and made the mistake of reading an intro to a book someone had sent me the link to online......... That was it, for the day..
I was ribbed constantly by my fella as i wasn't working and do you know what? I really didn't give a hoot, it was worth it, so i ignored everyone and read the whole book! I haven't done that for years.. I used to love reading but ended up not having enough time so stopped ...........My fellas face was a picture, he just couldn't help himself and kept calling me lazy, hoping I'd bite and stop reading it.......Nope.. Yesterday i was lazy, i did what i wanted for a change, not what everyone else wanted me to do........All 103 chapters of it...hehe...
Today its the Barford festival.... I'm so looking forward to this.......
I feel strangely refreshed this morning............ Watch out world!